why is it ok ~ OR ~ not ok to cheat when your married?

by **ANTHONYSS** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:41 am

*FIRST READ THE SCENARIO* a couple married 10 plus years who have had others involved in there sex life in the past. Now BOTH the man and woman are openly and seriously attracted to other people of the OPPOSITE sex and yet divorce is not wanted by either of the them but jealousy is a big issue for one of them ( only when it comes to the other persons fun ) What would you say to the person in the relationship who is not struggling with the jealousy issue but is unhappy due to the unfairness of the situation?

~ WOW ~ bitter anyone??? I guess this question should be more geared to the people who understand the alternative "lifestyle" and not so much for the people who don't understand the "lifestyle"

by **HeatherD638** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:45 am

Unfairness of the situation? You're married, you should have gotten your rocks off with other women before you made your vows. Get over it and start being faithful to your wife.

by **janicajayne015** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:45 am

Work it out with your spouse or get divorced. The other is being completely open about their relationships and jealousy issues....cheating will not improve the relationship.

by **Reverend** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:46 am

You may think all is ok but the damage is obviously being done or there would be NO concern. You need to sh*t or get off the pot. Try taking your marraige vows seriously if you want it to last.

by **LL140** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:49 am

decide what is wanted - if the marriage - time to commit to each other 100 %

by **cinnamongirl** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:52 am

It's not ok to cheat on your spouse. Having said that, get a divorce. I don't know why you would want to stay together, because this is a marriage in name only. If she's jealous, it's not because she wants you, it's because she doesn't want anyone else to have you (or play with her toy). Get real, get gone and give your life a chance to have a fulfilling marriage with someone who can be a partner in every sense of the word. Or are you getting something out of her jealousy? Is it a turn on? Does it make you feel needed/wanted? If I saw you coming, I'd run far and fast and wouldn't give you the time of day. Who needs your baggage?

by **your_girl_usa** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:52 am

My husband and I were in the lifestyle. When I found out he cheated on me I ended the lifestyle because we weren't in any shape to continue.
If the "non jealous person" is in love with the "jealous" person then you both need to stop going outside your marriage until both parties are on equal ground. Otherwise it might end up with hurt feelings that could end in Divorce.

by **craftycattt901** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:55 am

Nobody knows what goes on between two people so why judge. It depends on the situation and consequences if it is okay to cheat or not to.

by **mack843** on Sun May 10, 2009 3:56 am

WOW!! I really cannot believe some of the answers to this question. Has no one on here ever heard of an "Open Marriage?" I'm not advocating for or against but they DO exist and here y'all are jumping all over this poor guy. WTF???

Now; I don't really know what to say guy because your problem is one that I only dream about. However; I would suggest maybe discussing things with your spouse and attempt to come to some sort of agreement on where to go from here. Why is she so jealous of your fun? Is she not having the same fun? If not; maybe she needs to make some changes in her social/sexual life or; perhaps it Is time to consider monogamy but at least I didn't jump all down ur throat about it.

I sincerely hope you appreciate the objectivity. I Do love those best answers. lol

by **Kristiane-Cubicalninja307** on Sun May 10, 2009 4:07 am

I do not think you can sleep with other people, especially if jealousy is an issue, and expect to stay married.
Sorry.

why is it ok ~ OR ~ not ok to cheat when your married?